Anger; the act of understanding it and gaining control over it

Anger. The word itself conjures up images in our mind, and we all have such visceral emotions when we here this word. This is because it is common to all of us, as we have all experienced it and we know the power of anger and where it can take us. Anger, if not controlled can take us to some deep, dark places, and get us into some very hairy situations. It is like an out of control car… it starts off as nothing major… perhaps an abrupt swerve on the road that can be pretty easily be corrected… but if we don’t right that swerve and allow the car to careen, it can very, very easily become out of control and can eventually lead to a car wreck.

Now, transfer this to our lives, and we can see how anger can very literally take a hold of our being and it can control us. It is like we have been taken over or possessed. As human beings, we are subject to the Human Condition, which is the state where we are at the whim of our emotions. If we allowed our emotions to control us and we just followed them blindly, we would literally go through the gamut of our emotional selves in five minutes. Happy to sad to angry to depressed to elated and back again in a very small space of time. Luckily, we have a brain, a central control centre where a specific area of the brain - known as the Amygdala - has control over our emotions. Another area of our brain – the pre-frontal cortex – is also the part of our brain that allows us to exercise logic and reasoning. If we put these two together (which our brain does), We can control our emotional selves and exhibit self-control.

Okay, so back to Anger. Anger, although an emotional response, it is a secondary emotion and is usually borne of something else that is happening in our lives. It could rear its ugly head through frustration in our lives, through powerlessness, or perhaps not being heard by others. It can show itself easily and fast. In some people it builds up over a long while and then comes out, while in others it comes out very quickly through reactivity. It depends on the individual, their personality, and also how close to the surface the initial emotion lies.

How can we see the onset of anger before it can take hold of us? Well, the answer lies in self-awareness. Knowing our own triggers, or in other words what we react to because certain things go straight to our core and hurt us. This itself, is another topic worth exploring because, these triggers (or past traumas) come from much earlier in our lives, and have stayed with us for a long time. 

To become self-aware and aware of our emotional triggers takes time, but it is time well-invested. Through introspection and, if you are inclined to take it further, meditation, we can find these root causes and insecurities which cause this anger to rise so easily within us. I’m not saying it is easy, it isn’t and it is a continual journey.  

When we can see the anger rising within us, and we can realise why it has, we have more control over our own emotions because we have an understanding of what has triggered this within us. This is the beginning of self-mastery.

To know thyself is to know the universe and the gods.

Ben.